1.10. Charity Shop Elvis 
Leslie: Happy birthday to m-
Louise: I’m going to have you stop right there, Leslie. The English lyrics to “Happy Birthday” are copyrighted.
Leslie: … Um… can I sing it in German?
Louise: Go right ahead.
Leslie:
Zum Geburtstag viel Glück! Zum Geburtstag- oh never mind! It’s my birthday!

Louise: It sure is! Last time it was Sherman who aged up and today it’s you. And no one’s happier for you on your birthday than Sherman.
Sherman:
Joyeux anniversaire, joyeux anniversaaaaire!Louise: I do love working around copyright in utterly stupid ways. Don’t ask me how Sherman and Leslie learnt French and German respectively.

Leslie: Hey, I’m sparkling! Is this my pure and stubborn heart shining through to show that though I’ve been going through horrid hardships, I’m still beautiful on the inside?
Louise: Nah, it’s like that with everyone.
Leslie:

Sherman: Yay, now Leslie is old, too!

Leslie: … What does he mean ‘old’?
Rachyl:
I think he’s referring to the fact that your bottom is more wrinkly than it was yesterday. Soon, it'll be positively pruny.Leslie: Maybe I should divorce Sherman Forest…
Louise: Absolutely not!
Leslie: But… he makes me feel… old…
Louise: Oh brother, another midlife crisis coming right up.

Louise: Right, let’s leave Leslie back home for now and see what Sherman’s up to. He’s given up rummaging through trash for now and has decided to question people downtown. He interrupts someone who’s in the middle of protesting… yetis?

Green jacket guy: It’s just wrong, man. They can’t leave yetis to roam the streets.
Louise: Well, they don’t. They don’t exist.
Sherman: Can you tell me where you were the day after tomorrow?
Green jacket guy: … I beg your pardon?
Sherman: I’ve been led to believe that Leslie is, in fact, perfect. True or true?
Green jacket guy: Help?
Sherman: Did you know that armadillos are the only animals other than humans who can get leprosy?

Sherman: *Joyfully scribbling*
Green jacket guy: I should probably get back to protesting fantasy creatures.
Sherman: Last question! If a dragon crosses the road are you then guilty of murder?
Green jacket guy: *Runs away*
Louise: I don’t know how Sherman is on level five of his career right now?

Louise: It’s not better that he decides to interrogate his boss. Remember him? He’s the guy who thinks Leslie’s hot and apparently he’s Sherman’s boss now. It makes me seriously concerned for SimNation that Sherman and Leslie are apparently the only people who can hold down a job.

Leslie: I-I think that’s a wrinkle. A big, fat, wrinkly wrinkle!
Louise: That is your nose. Calm your crackers.
Leslie: But I think that if I possibly perhaps just divorced Sherman a tiny, little bit…
Louise: How do you divorce someone a little bit?! Okay, I had it with you. Let’s see something else happen like… like…
Flo: A party?

Louise: Yes, heck! Give me a party! Flo is going to a party at her family’s house. There she gets to see her grandchildren and… Hey, it’s creepy elf hat guy!
Creepy elf hat guy: Boo! This party reeks!
Louise: Hi there! Long time, no see! What are you up to?
Creepy elf hat guy: Oh, just preparing myself for the inevitable armadillo takeover and following apocalypse.
Louise: … I quit.
Flo:

Louise: Yeah, I quit. I’m done. Flo, you narrate this thing. I’m afraid I’ll go insane if I keep it up.

Flo: Um, sure, ‘kay. This here’s my grandson. His name’s Drew. I don’t know why he looks so scared.
Drew: (I’m so scared of heights don’t throw me in the air, please Watcher, get me down).
Flo: But he sure is adorable.

Flo: It’s a nice party for sure. I’m dancing with this guy, Fabio.
Fabio: That’s not my name!
Flo: Well, I don’t remember your name. Nobody else will either. I’ll only remember the mighty fine dancing we did!
Fabio: I guess that’s good?

Flo: Back home, Leslie’s changed into something more comfortable.
Leslie: I-I’m young. I’m so very young. Young. And sexy. And more younger. Maybe, combining this with just a teensy little divorce…

Flo: And here’s my best little mate. It’s about time we saw what Kristy gets up to. What with her sister being sort of insane, she easily slides in the background, so let’s see what she’s going to do the next day.

Flo: So, you’re off to the Winter Festival?
Kristy: Yeah! I’m going to dance all night. *High fives Flo*
Flo: *High five* But hey, ain’t that car driving down the road Sherman’s? Where’s he off to?

Sherman: A makeover will make me young again. I’ll be young and then I can go back to worship Leslie and her babies…
Flo: Oh, this should be fun.

Sherman: Aaw yeah!
Flo: Oh my-
Louise: SHERMAN, NO.
Flo: Huh, I thought you quit-
Louise: Oh, get lost, Flo, I can’t leave you nutters alone for five minutes without you doing something… something… what the heck are you wearing?
Sherman: I’m making myself sexy for Leslie!

Sherman: A-and see, you can’t even see my wrinkles anymore.
Leslie: Did someone point a gun at your head and force you to do an Elvis impersonation with only clothes from a charity shop?
Sherman: I look good!
Louise: If I stay around you two for much longer, I’ll end up quitting again. Let’s see what Kristy’s up to now.

Kristy: Don’t mind me, just swinging to the groovy beat.
Louise: Oh, thank goodness. You’re almost acting normal.

Kristy: Yeah, the Winter Festival’s wicked! I get to throw snow at little girls.

Kristy: And to wear shoes that really hurt people if you kick them. It’s awesome.
Louise: Well, you better enjoy your childhood memories while you can.

Louise: Because soon, it’s time to move on. Yes, the day has finally come for the girls to become teens and we’ll see how that fares next time. As with all things having to do with these weirdoes, though, it’s not easy.
Author's note: The lyrics to Happy Birthday really are copyrighted, but only in English. Not that anybody cares - I just think it's such a fun, useless fact. Go ahead and sing Happy Birthday to friends and family... so long as you do it in any language other than English.
And yeah, Leslie rolled a want to divorce Sherman. That's just not going to happen, sunshine. Then she wanted to move to another house - once again, not possible according to legacy rules. Sherman wants things like a new (much too expensive) car and a makeover. The makeover is the only thing I've let him have.