Author Topic: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Complete]  (Read 3267 times)

Offline oshizu

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Part Four]
« Reply #25 on: April 09, 2016, 05:28:44 AM »
The legs poking out of the bushes in Part 1 threw me off guard.
Because of those legs, I kept waiting for the today-Majnun to make an appearance in the story.
I hadn't even stopped to imagine a predecessor God of Magic & Madness!

And now I will shut my mouth and wait for the epilogue!  :-X

Offline KRae

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Part Four]
« Reply #26 on: April 09, 2016, 10:28:42 AM »
Same here. You caught both of us off guard. This was even better though - a great origin story.

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Offline LivvieLove

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Part Four]
« Reply #27 on: April 09, 2016, 12:56:26 PM »
The legs poking out of the bushes in Part 1 threw me off-guard.
Because of those legs, I kept waiting for the today-Majnun to make an appearance in the story.
I hadn't even stopped to imagine of a predecessor God of Magic & Madness!

And now I will shut my mouth and wait for the epilogue!  :-X
I'm glad! That was their intention! I was hoping to throw everyone off the scent while Majnun snuck by unnoticed. ::) XD
Here comes the Epilogue! I promise!

Same here. You caught both of us off guard. This was even better though - a great origin story.
Thank you! I'm so glad it was a surprise! One Epilogue coming your way!

Offline mpart

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Part Four]
« Reply #28 on: April 09, 2016, 12:57:13 PM »
Yay! This story is unblocked again! Thank you to the moderator who as unblocked this wonderful story! I just want to say, I love, love, this story. It is written very well and the screenshots are something out of this world.  :)

Offline Magpie2012

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Part Four]
« Reply #29 on: April 09, 2016, 02:10:41 PM »
Yay! I can finally comment! I hope my mail to Carl et al is what did it :-) this is EPIC! Liv, you have out-done yourself with this origin story! I am now even more of a Majnun fangirl than I was before <3

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Offline LivvieLove

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #30 on: April 09, 2016, 02:16:51 PM »
Epilogue
The Prediction

Majnun grew to tolerate his new position of power, though he loathed the bouts of insanity that came with it.
Insanity drove his brothers to their deaths. It nearly drove him to his, and now he was the god of it. The irony was not lost on him.
Agonin had taken Majnun in front of the pantheon of the gods after they left Dragon Valley where he was prodded and examined with skeptical eyes of the many powerful beings there. Majnun had no trouble asserting a name for himself, even going so far as to directly challenge Nyx, the Goddess of the Moon - and the oldest of all the gods, minus the sisters of Time. Majnun had no fear of the gods or anything else. He had lost everything, including his own sanity on most days, so he felt he had far more he could risk when making challenges.
Majnun left the council of the gods and vanished for a long year of solitude where he trained his magic - and his mind.
Being the God of Magic meant he had to tame and control the magic that existed in the world. Agonin had dragged on in his lengthy explanation on where it came from and what would happen if didn't control it.
Majnun didn't need him to drone on - he already knew. Dragon Valley had been turned to ash. He saw it with his own eyes.
It had been one long year since he had spoken with Agonin, and truthfully, Majnun thought it wasn't long enough, but he knew the time had come for him to emerge from the shadows. He could do whatever he wished now, yet the trouble came with knowing exactly what he even wanted anymore.
Majnun stood at the front of a tidy house. It had Agonin written all over it, that was certain.

Majnun resisted knocking over the flowers or changing their colors. There was so much he felt was wrong with how neatly everything existed. Life was not neat. Life was not clean. Life was not perfect rows of flowers or straight lines. Majnun twitched as a burst of insanity ran through him, garbling his mind briefly before his mind reestablished the barriers protecting him.

He scowled at the incident. The others had told him it would get easier with time, and in a way it had. Most of his magical energy was used on maintaining the magic of the world at all times. Despite this seemingly never-ending task, he always had plenty of strength and magical reserve left to do as he pleased with - which for him meant establishing the dam in his head between him and the madness and doing everything he ever could to never let it seep through. It took a long year to master the art of those barriers and now here he stood, ready to come out of hiding and do... whatever it is that gods do.
The door opened for him as he approached and he was met by a nymph-woman who held wisdom in her eyes. She tipped her head and extended her arm, inviting him inside.

Majnun gave her a twisted look, wondering if he could invoke a reaction from her, but had no such luck. His face became flat and he sighed as he entered. The whole house made him thoroughly uncomfortable. He felt a chill run through him; Finreth wouldn't have cared about how clean a room was, but he was not that boy anymore. His year spent in solitude staving off madness had twisted him regardless of how much he hoped it wouldn't.
"So it is you, Majnun. You're looking..." Agonin took in the outfit Majnun had on with a sense of displeasure, "different."
Majnun grinned at Agonin's unease, thoroughly pleased he could make his adversary as uncomfortable as this house made him. "Miss me, did you?" His voice was strained, but level and sane.
"Like one misses a thorn from their side," he shook his head, "you are but a necessary evil."
Majnun's grin grew wider still, "that's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me." He raised his eyebrows.
It was the dance he and Agonin did, and despite how it sounded it was really a display of mutual respect.

"I am finishing a project and will join you shortly. Minha, please take Majnun to the sitting area." Agonin turned and began to walk into a side archway.
Minha shifted uncomfortably at the job, and Majnun gave her a devious look. She sucked in her cheek and nodded, "follow me, please."
A burst of insane laughter came through Majnun's lips causing Minha to jump. She wasn't as confident with her master gone from her sight. "Are you the unlucky wife, then?" Majnun was trying his best to read her.
Minha's eyes grew wide and her face became firm, "how dare you!" She called. Majnun knew he did something correctly when someone had to ask him why he would say such a thing and his face grew more smug. "I am his high priestess!" She corrected.
"Ah, that explains why you look like a killjoy."
Minha's eyes grew wide and her fists clenched. She turned on her heal sharply and straightened herself, "this way." She commanded.
Majnun chuckled and followed her out into the atrium.

Women wandered the garden and spoke quietly to each other, all of them trying not to stare at him as he entered. Despite the discomfort he felt from being in such a pristine place, he was growing more confident and cocky as he sensed the discord his presence alone held.
He turned to take it all in when he caught a pair of deep red eyes staring back at him. She was unmoved by his presence, and even smiled at him from where she stood, her eyes reflecting an emotion unknown to him. 

Majnun shifted uneasily under her gaze before he nodded once in her direction and moved forward, yet her eyes lingered on him as he passed. Out of all the things in the house that made him uneasy - something about her stare was the worst.
Minha escorted Majnun to a room of white furniture before huffing out of the room. Majnun smirked again, letting the unease pass. He settled down on a couch and happily took pride in his shoes rubbing into the pristine white couch.

It wasn't long before Agonin joined Majnun, his face was unamused as he took in Majnun's position on his couch. He cleared his throat and sat on another couch, crossing his legs and looking at Majnun levelly. "I admit I was a little worried you had gone rogue like Zachurr had during your absence - however you kept up the magical energy, so I figured all was well."
Majnun shrugged, "not rogue, just mad." He hated it, but he would never let Agonin know that.
"Have you thought about your next steps - establishing your realm, gathering some followers, selecting a high priest or priestess?"

Majnun raised his eyebrows, "why?"
Agonin looked at him, confused.
He elaborated, "why would I want to do any of that?"
Agonin nodded and Majnun knew he had just summoned the lengthy explanation that he would not be able to wiggle himself out of. "You'll need a realm - a home base, so to speak - so you can have a place of privacy to return to when you need to..." he cleared his throat, "recharge." He shifted on the couch, "usually it's in the place you recognize as your home, so perhaps Dragon Valley would be that for you?"
Majnun's face twitched and his lip curled slightly, "pass."
Agonin raised his eyebrows but his face settled and he continued. "Have a following will make completing tasks much easier for you, not to mention, it's not a terrible idea to establish yourself amongst the gods and goddesses." He motioned to the girls who were in the atrium, collecting water from the fountain. "I have many followers, and they all show their allegiance by following my image."
Majnun gritted his teeth, but didn't let it show outwardly, "no wonder everyone looks like they've been whacked by the obedience stick." His voice fluctuated and rose up higher as he spoke. He cleared his throat and forced his voice back down.
Agonin smiled at Majnun's fight, "I see you're still working on self-control."

Majnun grimaced, but shrugged again. He did that often enough because he knew the action itself bothered Agonin - as did indecisiveness, and anything else Majnun thoroughly enjoyed. "Who needs it?" He let his his voice fall deep and his eyes go crazed.
He did. He absolutely did. He just would never let Agonin know.
Agonin looked perturbed, but he didn't say anything else on the matter. "As for your high priest or priestess... those are almost essential. They will act as your right hand and carry out your orders for you. They also have gifts that are most useful."
Majnun was hardly listening, but his ears did perk up at the last part, "you don't say? What gifts could they offer me?"
Agonin tipped his head, "divination, specifically."
This term was unfamiliar to Majnun, though he had spent a lot of his sane periods studying up on anything he could find to improve his knowledge of the subject he now controlled. Majnun gave him a half-smile, "that's a term I'm not familiar with. Enlighten me, oh rigid one?"

Agonin sighed but continued, "divination is the act of seeing the future through a set of blank cards."
"How useful. Blank cards. You would've thought I invented the game myself." Majnun grinned.
"-the cards change depending on the person reading it and their skill level with divination. The messages will be clearer or more vague depending on their skill as well. Divination cannot be used to learn your own future, however, which is why most gods have their high priest or priestess take up the skill." Agonin finished.
Majnun nodded, "so why would I want to know my own future? That sounds awfully boring and predictable. Also, isn't there some kind of paradox about knowing the future? You'll make something happen if... something... something..." He gritted his teeth as he fought off the incoming wave of insanity that pressed against his barriers. Turnips. Sunshine. Falling off over the-
"Majnun?" Agonin waved his hand at him curiously. "Are you alright?"
Majnun jolted and looked at Agonin with wide eyes before he shook his head and returned to his normal state. He swallowed hard and nodded. "Just so entranced by your stories, is all."
Agonin shook his head, "I won't keep you for much longer. I am..." he paused and forced the words out, "glad to see you are on your feet again."
Majnun laughed, "are we going to hug it out now too?" He mocked.
Agonin almost laughed at the thought, but the man never laughed. He never had fun. He probably thought organizing his books alphabetically, by size, and color was a riot of a good time. The thought made Majnun's skin crawl. "I suppose I'll be seeing you around more often then, oh austere one."
Agonin tapped twice on the floor with his foot, "Alessandra?" He called, and the girl with piercing red eyes made an appearance, bowing lowly before Agonin, but her eyes stayed locked on Majnun.
"Yes, father?" Her voice was sickeningly sweet and Majnun gritted his teeth at the sound of it. So proper. So perfect. Just like Agonin. Father? That was news to him. Having children certainly wasn't order, Majnun thought idly. Then again, he took in the appearance of the woman in front of him and realized she was basically Agonin's clone. Practically perfect, not a hair out of place. It disturbed him.

"Why don't you take Majnun back and have Minha divinate his fortune before he leaves." Agonin said while not looking at his daughter.
Majnun turned and finally looked at Alessandra with a half smile while trying his best to not grimace. Her smile only grew and he found his own smile faltering with unease.
"This way, Majnun." She spoke his name slowly as her eyes searched him. All of him. He felt his skin crawl, but he nodded and walked next to the eerie woman and into a back room where Minha was calmly holding her hand up over white sheets of paper.

"Minha, the master has ordered a future to be predicted for the great God of Magic, Majnun."
Majnun did not look at her as she spoke, but his discomfort grew.
Minha looked up at Majnun with distaste. Why couldn't Alessandra give him that look? She wasn't insane by his classifications, but she should be, he decided.
Minha laid out the cards in front of her and held her hand over them, whispering under her breath. She finally spoke to him, "stand in front of the table, please."

Majnun did so awkwardly, wondering what kind of voodoo he would witness next.

Alessandra watched the scene with interest, hoping to get a glimpse of his future for herself.
Minha held out her hand to him and motioned for him to give her his hand. He scowled but handed her his hand which she turned palm side up and raked her fingernails across. He recoiled his hand and she tried her best to not look smug.
She began a soft chant under her breath until her eyes rolled back into her head briefly. After she slumped forward, she held her hand out in front of her. "Which card do you choose?"
Majnun was growing amused at the display, and he selected the middle card. Minha slowly picked the card up and examined it thoroughly.

Minha stifled a laugh before she flipped the card around and showed him the image that had appeared.
Majnun's face twisted in confusion. "A... flower?" He raised his eyebrows at Minha.
Minha pursed her lips, "not just any flower, a daffodil."
"Great. I'll have a flower in my future. Good to know. Hey, I bet when I walk out the door, the prediction will come true!" Majnun grinned widely.
"Flowers don't mean flowers," Minha corrected, "usually they are representative of women. In this case - a woman. You will have a great love in your life."
Alessandra's eyes darted to him immediately, wide and searching.

Majnun shook his head but said nothing as a smile tugged on his lips as he laughed hollowly. "Right, whatever you say." His words implied disbelief. Like anyone could ever love his madness. He was sure it was rubbish at this point.
Majnun tipped his head and left the house, summoning up his portal to resume his training. His mind was still reeling from that silly party trick, but he let it pass. His future was unknown, and he preferred it that way.

Alessandra watched him go with a light in her eyes. "I look forward to seeing you again," she whispered as he left. She knew their paths would cross again, she would make sure of it.

Majnun's future was filled with daffodils. He just didn't know it yet.

-------------------------------------------
Fin.

Offline LivvieLove

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #31 on: April 09, 2016, 02:24:59 PM »
Yay! This story is unblocked again! Thank you to the moderator who as unblocked this wonderful story! I just want to say, I love, love, this story. It is written very well and the screenshots are something out of this world.  :)
Yes! Thanks to the might @Trip! Thank you so much for your wonderful comments and for helping me get this story together in the first place! It's done now! Thank you again so much!


Yay! I can finally comment! I hope my mail to Carl et al is what did it :-) this is EPIC! Liv, you have out-done yourself with this origin story! I am now even more of a Majnun fangirl than I was before <3

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Thank you for reaching out on my behalf! I ended up getting a hold of Trip who unlocked the story! Thank you for your wonderful comments! Majnun is kind of my brain-child and I'm sort of falling in love with him the more time I spend with him (just kidding, I'm crazy about this mad man). Thank you so much for your compliments and following this story. I've put a lot of work into this story and the others.

Thank you to everyone who's supported, commented or even just read! Hopefully I did the story some justice!

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Offline Nettlejuice

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Part Four]
« Reply #32 on: April 09, 2016, 02:28:36 PM »
Argh, my comment yesterday did get posted >.< I was shocked over Finreth killing both his brothers and when Agonin showed up I thought we'd be in for a happy ending. Clearly I was wrong, or right as Majnun seems to be happy as he is. Now I'm just hoping the clues you've provided here will come to mind when I get to the right point in your other stories =D Also, what a fantastic way to write an origin story!
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Offline LivvieLove

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #33 on: April 09, 2016, 03:07:44 PM »
Argh, my comment yesterday did get posted >.< I was shocked over Finreth killing both his brothers and when Agonin showed up I thought we'd be in for a happy ending. Clearly I was wrong, or right as Majnun seems to be happy as he is. Now I'm just hoping the clues you've provided here will come to mind when I get to the right point in your other stories =D Also, what a fantastic way to write an origin story!
I'll just have to say that, given where the Reapers are currently, Majnun gets as happy of an ending as could be allowed given the... circumstances. :-X
I'll say nothing else, as I don't want to spoil anything further! :D
The clues should, hopefully, be big enough. The most important one will be the Daffodil. :D

Thank you so much for your kind words! I've been in love with this crazy god for a while now and I'm glad that I could expand his character in a different direction from what people are used to seeing him as. Making him into this complex character has be oodles of fun!

Offline oshizu

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #34 on: April 09, 2016, 05:26:09 PM »
Thank you for this epilogue, LivvieLove, tying your tale to the larger Reaper narrative.
It will make your descriptions of Alecca's childhood (you do plan on that, don't you? *prays) so much more profound and moving.

My favorite screenshot of this epilogue? You can no doubt guess.
It's the shot of Majunun right before his words: "Enlighten me, oh rigid one"?
There are of course strong suggestions of Finreth--he's even lovelier than when he appeared in Anne's story.

You mentioned in the Reaper thread that you went out one day to find the cityscape entirely gray with only daffodils to break the monotony.
It must be a sign that Majnun approves of your story of his origins!

Offline LivvieLove

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #35 on: April 09, 2016, 06:21:53 PM »
Thank you for this epilogue, LivvieLove, tying your tale to the larger Reaper narrative.
It will make your descriptions of Alecca's childhood (you do plan on that, don't you? *prays) so much more profound and moving.

My favorite screenshot of this epilogue? You can no doubt guess.
It's the shot of Majunun right before his words: "Enlighten me, oh rigid one"?
There are of course strong suggestions of Finreth--he's even lovelier than when he appeared in Anne's story.

You mentioned in the Reaper thread that you went out one day to find the cityscape entirely gray with only daffodils to break the monotony.
It must be a sign that Majnun approves of your story of his origins!
Aleccas's childhood will absolutely be shown, I'm just taking my time and enjoying Majnun and Anne. Besides, poor Jupiter has his hands full with the Labelles, so how could I possibly move forward without more closure for our dearest blind heiress? Majnun and Anne's story is only relatively just beginning when I realized I wanted to include some of Majnun's past with Anne, and I realized it would be fun for everyone to actually see how things happened.
Majnun's crooked half-smile is darling though. This is entirely the same man that shows up in the market not but 1700 years later and causes a disturbance with some paints. ;)

I think Majnun must approve of my story - or at least, Anne, and if Anne approves, he approves. Simple as that (he doesn't get much of a choice otherwise).

Offline mpart

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #36 on: April 09, 2016, 06:29:03 PM »
Besides, poor Jupiter has his hands full with the Labelles, so how could I possibly move forward without more closure for our dearest blind heiress?

It isn't Kaida's fault that she enjoys torturing Jupiter. She is just a child! Maleficent, is just Maleficent. She can torture whoever she wants.  8)

Offline Magpie2012

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #37 on: April 09, 2016, 11:47:12 PM »
I still say that Allesandra *word redacted* kills Anne. She just wouldn't be able to bear the thought that she wasn't Majnun's Daffodil! I love this! It really gives us some insight into what makes Majnun tick (I'm so tempted to call him Maj but that would smack of disrespect and we all know I adore the bejeebbers out of him!)

For someone who values sanity, it must be really hard for him to battle the madness inside. I think, maybe, that losing Anne would be what tips him over the edge, so to speak...

*fangirling* so lovely *fangirling*

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Offline LivvieLove

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #38 on: April 10, 2016, 12:03:25 AM »
I still say that Allesandra *word redacted* kills Anne. She just wouldn't be able to bear the thought that she wasn't Majnun's Daffodil! I love this! It really gives us some insight into what makes Majnun tick (I'm so tempted to call him Maj but that would smack of disrespect and we all know I adore the bejeebbers out of him!)

For someone who values sanity, it must be really hard for him to battle the madness inside. I think, maybe, that losing Anne would be what tips him over the edge, so to speak...

*fangirling* so lovely *fangirling*

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@mpart and I were just talking about this the other day, actually. Alessandra isn't a very likable character from Anne and Majnun's perspective, no, but think of it this way (REAPER SPOILERS BELOW if you haven't read the story to it's current point - 4/9/16):
Alessandra has loved Majnun basically since this point in his life (1,700 years before Anne). She's tried everything to win his affections and be with him. She became his wife, and she thought everything was perfect - then he took another wife. And another. She could justify those away though, because the second wife wasn't human (Kai, the nymph), and the third wasn't magical (Charlotte, an original vampire, but not a magical source). Alessandra spent ages trying to be his wife and suddenly this mortal girl with no powers walks in and with a flip of her hair has Majnun rolling over like a puppy for her whims.
I mean, I think it's no secret that we all know that Majnun really, really likes Anne, moreso than anyone before.
Just something to think about.   :)
Also, while I know who killed Anne, I'm not saying a word on the matter. :-X ::) Well, unless you really want to know, then you can PM me and I'll gladly spill all my secrets. I will say it's a lot more complex than most people have been guessing though, but I really love seeing what people think! We're only just beginning with Majnun and Anne's story. ;)

Offline oshizu

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #39 on: April 10, 2016, 12:33:29 AM »
Quote
Aleccas's childhood will absolutely be shown, I'm just taking my time and enjoying Majnun and Anne.

Of course I don't mean to rush you with Majnun and Anne, not at all!  Not in the least!  Not for a second.
I must confess that I am clinging to the thought of more Majnun madness and thought if I made an appeal for words on Alecca's childhood I would also be able to read more about Majnun.
What a cheap shot--I feel so underhanded...

Offline LivvieLove

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #40 on: April 10, 2016, 12:59:45 AM »
Quote
Aleccas's childhood will absolutely be shown, I'm just taking my time and enjoying Majnun and Anne.

Of course I don't mean to rush you with Majnun and Anne, not at all!  Not in the least!  Not for a second.
I must confess that I am clinging to the thought of more Majnun madness and thought if I made an appeal for words on Alecca's childhood I would also be able to read more about Majnun.
What a cheap shot--I feel so underhanded...
Do not feel that way! I was not implying that you were rushing me, just that we will be spending an extra large amount of time following Majnun and his interactions with Anne and subsequently Aleccas.
Never feel underhanded! I love that you asked, seeing as I was actually just worrying recently that I was spending too much time on Majnun. So, that helps sort that out for me!

Offline Magpie2012

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #41 on: April 10, 2016, 01:44:21 AM »
*rushes off to PM* I'm a sucker for spoilers!

Anyway, loved this, and if Aleccas' origin story is half as good, I'll die a happy simmer!

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because... Math *Pippin The Most Tenacious Simmer*

Only 2 things are infinite... The universe and human stupidity. And I'm not sure about the universe. *Albert Einstein*

Don't believe all the quotes that have been attributed to me. *Albert Einstein*

I can't ignore ALL of the voices in my head - Some of them actually make sense! *Blayzen*

Offline oshizu

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Epilogue]
« Reply #42 on: April 10, 2016, 03:14:37 AM »
Quote
I love that you asked, seeing as I was actually just worrying recently that I was spending too much time on Majnun. So, that helps sort that out for me!

In response to your worrying about spending too much time on Manjun, I reply with the title of of one of my favorite Luther Vandross songs:
  Never too much!

Offline Nutella

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Complete]
« Reply #43 on: April 21, 2016, 01:21:13 PM »
I'm moving this to the completed stories board, congratulations @oshizu.

Offline oshizu

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Complete]
« Reply #44 on: April 21, 2016, 04:41:16 PM »
I'm moving this to the completed stories board, congratulations @oshizu.
@Nutella

I (oshizu) am indeed the last person to post in this wonderful thread but the author of this story is LivvieLove  :)

Offline Nutella

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Complete]
« Reply #45 on: April 21, 2016, 04:50:59 PM »
Whoops, my bad.  Going to blame it on old age  :o

Congratulations @LivvieLove

Offline LivvieLove

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Re: Risen From the Ashes: A Short Story [Complete]
« Reply #46 on: April 21, 2016, 09:40:12 PM »
I'm moving this to the completed stories board, congratulations @oshizu.
@Nutella

I (oshizu) am indeed the last person to post in this wonderful thread but the author of this story is LivvieLove  :)
Thank you for catching that! =D

Whoops, my bad.  Going to blame it on old age  :o

Congratulations @LivvieLove
No worries! Happens in my head all the time - and I don't have age as an excuse! XD

 

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