Here's Looking At You Kid
Hey, NJ!
Wow, you are worse at telling origin stories than my Mum. Well, hello again, it's me. Elysium. I don't like being called Ely anymore. So, I've been reaaally busy painting and exploring Willow Creek without Mum telling me not to do this or that and especially not to talk to strangers - male ones. Bald male ones. We're having a strange invasion of bald headed women in town lately. Mum keeps lamenting about it but I just laugh and compliment their appearance - hey, I'm making a dozen friends already. I think I've found one woman Uncle Don is not fond of.
Here is a photo from my birthday. Thanks, Dad, you could have waited for when I'd perfected my appearance before taking it.
After what seemed like forever in my wardrobe I made my way to the Roomies household. Those Patel boys are lucky I even talked to them because my flirting seemed to upset everyone. I've never been so embarrassed before.
Mum celebrated her birthday with Dad and J. That look on her face is priceless and of course she scolded me for laughing and told me I'd be old and wrinkly one day.
Colten had his teen birthday on Friday so he couldn't go to school. It seemed the best time for Aunty Nance to patch up her relationship with Uncle Geoff and Malcolm so the Landgraabs went on holiday. I watched them leave with envy but Colten promised to tell me how it all went.
Aunty Nance found the best way to become friends with your ex-husband was to stargaze and reminisce about their life now that they were oldies. I'm super glad they don't have a pool in their holiday lot, I've seen enough barely clothed old people to last a lifetime.
Colten mostly fished. Look at those skinny arms and legs! Mum says he has to have a high calorie diet when he's back home to get some meat on him but I think he's fine just the way he is.
When he wasn't cloud gazing with his Mum, Malcolm called one of his girlfriends over and I don't need to tell you what went on there.
Just admiring the view, Ely.
Sure, bro.
Mum and Dad still go on dates and lock themselves in the bedroom and get so mad when I even think of inviting a male friend home.
I wasn't even surprised when the Landgraabs were supervising when Clark Hilton came home with me. Aunty Nance is like my Other Mother - without button eyes - so I understand why she was there but I don't believe Uncle Geoff's hypocrisy. Clark is his son with some townie woman so for me it's like when Uncle Don tries to flirt with Mum and she starts retching. And we were doing our homework for goodness sake.
I've become like my Mum. When J goes swimming I turn my easel to face the pool so I can appreciate the way water glistens on his body and the slow mo head shake that he does. It gets ruined when the likes of Nina Caliente or Zoe Patel are splashing around and kissing him. Mum says it's a crush that I'll get over and I don't dare say the same to her, we all know what a temper she has, right?
Speaking of crushes, Colten's got a girlfriend! The kid is younger than me and he's allowed to date and an older girl at that! SMH! (I hope you know what that means, my Mum still finds the 21st century confusing.) Oh, well, he's lucky to have the gorgeous Olivia SKL as his girlfriend.
Aren't we a little old to play in a Wendy house?
Hold on, selfie time. Wait, that one turned out wrong.He chuckles as I take a few more snaps.
Hey, little bro, Colt! Want to be best buddies forever?
I thought we already were? Why are you taking pictures of us hugging?
Dynasty stuff. Thanks, kid!
First masterpiece ever! Yay me! Mum's been playing with MOO a lot lately but I forgot to tell her she didn't need it for placing that bust on the pedestal. It's great and reminds me of how the Great Masters would have practised as apprentices. Plus it makes me look like a true artist.
Now the next part will bring tears to your eyes for sure. Aunty Nance and Uncle Geoff worked out their differences (they dumped all their respective partners) and renewed their vows. Usually old people kissing grosses me out but it was so sweet to finally have them back together. I cried a bucket load of tears and you won't be seeing the pictures, they were destroyed ASAP.
Mum hosted a house party and we all pitched in to get a Gold. J made drinks and kept Uncle Don busy (Dad also kept tabs on him after he winked at Mum in a yucky way). I danced with Olivia - now a young adult, poor Colt - and Johnny the Jerk had the nerve to join in on our conversation.
Uncle Geoff made a Hamburger cake and even though she's supposed to be dieting, Mum gorged on at least two pieces. Uncle Don was throwing insults at Johnny - we're not the only household to hate on him, ha ha - and kisses to Nina. We're lucky Mum didn't choke on cake that day.
People get the impression we're loud and wild because of all the parties we throw but we're not really. Most evenings we like to just chill and listen to Mum play whatever instrument takes her fancy. There are several requirements we have yet to complete, though at times we takes things slow. You can't enjoy immortality if all you did during your actual life was stress and rush around like maniacs.
Anyway, this letter is longer than anything I've ever written so bye!
Elysium Chant.
